Cold + Wet + Wind

A  last note about sub-zero aquatics on New Year's Day. I admit to being a cold weenie but having the aromatic spray from the Mississippi in your face at such temperatures is unimaginable. It seems that you have to be the kind of person who wears a flamingo on his head to tolerate it.    

Fox & Friends

I didn't see anyone dressed like this in the frigid Mississippi after I arrived but I suspect the event began before the advertised hour of noon. There was a picture in the Post-Dispatch yesterday taken from the back of someone water skiing in a Santa suit. I didn't see it. But was it this man? The suit doesn't look soaking wet.

A couple of the TV stations always show up with reporters and camera operators. You can see them milling around below. (New Year's is usually a slow news day.) The local Fox outlet got an interview with the person who would have played Santa in Frozen if Santa had appeared in Frozen. No Fox in this household. We watch MSNBC.   

BTW, that skin color and tone is a nice example of what the Fuji X-T2 can do. My 5DM3 would have put too much magenta in the face and coat.   

The Age Of Crazy Has Not Passed

It was -5F / -20.5C when I woke up yesterday morning. At noon on the riverfront it was 4F / -15.5. The water temperature was just below freezing. Remember, we are on about the same parallel as Sicily and Athens.

Being New Year's Day, it was time for the annual water ski run on the Mississippi by the Missouri Disabled Water Ski Association, a fine organization that gets people usually confined to wheelchairs out on the water at high speed. Fine people, yes, but they don't all necessarily have all their marbles together.

I've shot this event before and on some cold days, but I've never seen ice in the river on January 1. It left the skiers with little room to maneuver. Only two people tried and only one actually got up.      

First day of  shooting with just the Fujifilm X-T2. There were other photographers with big Canon cameras and bigger white lenses. Doubt they got better shots than I did and my shoulders left in better shape.    

Adventures In Hypothermia

We assume these people knew what they were doing, but, geez, is this really fun? Some, like the woman in the top photo, wore the appropriate thermal headgear but most didn't. Some were barefoot, which is incredible to me. À chacun son goût. I'd rather just take their pictures. But then there's skydiving . . .                

Not The Way To The North Pole

Santa made a wrong turn somewhere around Minneapolis while trying to find his way home.

Actually, this is one of the members of the Missouri Disabled Water Ski Association. They do their thing in the Mississippi River under the Arch on New Year's Day. The members wear whatever one does for plunging into cold water. (And the water was cold yesterday. At least there was no ice floating in the river.) Personally I think they're nuts, although for a good cause.         

Shall We Gather At The River?

The water skiers and kayakers were not the only people out for a ride by the chilly Mississippi on New Year's Day. As I approached the levee I saw a group of men in black leather jackets, standing hand-in-hand in a circle around an orange Harley. The patch on the back of most of their jackets said Christian Motorcyclists Association. So, bikers for Jesus? I guess that was the idea.

I immediately thought of the old hymn mentioned in today's title. However, I don't think the Mississippi flows by the throne of God. It does flow by New Orleans, though, which may be sort of the opposite.           

Another Form Of Aquatic Recreation

The frozen water skiers were not the only people playing on the Mississippi on New Year's Day. While they were having their fun, if that's what it was, a small group of kayakers floated by.  (I bet they only go downstream.) They seem as amazed as I was. Their challenge, however, was to stay far clear of the enormous barges that ply the river. Just the wake could overwhelm one of these little vessels.

Note the dog along for the ride in the top picture.      

What Fools These Mortals Be

So says Puck in A Midsummer-Night's Dream (Act III, Scene II). This man and at least one other I saw Wednesday tried to water ski in the Mississippi barefoot. They leave the dock in regular skis, loosely fastened, I assume, and at some point leap out of them. Then the, um, performer tries to hydroplane on his or her feet. The usual result is immediate disaster.

This is simply nuts. It may not have been awfully cold here on New Year's Day (although it will be awfully cold over the next few days) but, you know, this river starts in Minnesota. Major freezer action. And look at that fall. He could have easily broken his neck. Have you ever heard of the Darwin Awards?          

Those Same Crazy People

It happens here and there in the northern US and, I assume, cold places around the world. People jump into bodies of icy water on New Year's Day. When I was growing up I remember people who called themselves the Polar Bear Club swimming in the Atlantic at Coney Island. Here, they go water skiing in the Mississippi.

I've shot the event other years. Yesterday was the warmest New Year's Day in some time, 43F/6C at the start of the event. It benefits the Missouri Disabled Water Ski Association, a group that gets people with severe handicaps out on the water and moving fast.

This fellow was doing a handstand on his board, which soon resulted in a very cold splash.          

Call Me Crazy

It was New Year's Day and time to go visit my friends from the Missouri Disabled Water Ski Association doing their annual Polar Bear Club craziness. They go water skiing in the frigid Mississippi to raise funds for their work teaching people with major handicaps, including paraplegics and amputees, to enjoy the sport. Nice people. A little loopy but very nice.

This gentleman was doing handstands on what I'd call a boogie board if I saw it at the beach. In the end, human weakness and the laws of physics took over.

Madness, For A Cause

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The announcer said the water temperature was 35 F / 2 C. The air was a notch warmer but then the river comes from way up north. Nevertheless, people put their bodies on and, inevitably, into it.

This was the annual New Year's Day water skiing excursion on the frigid Mississippi for the benefit of the Missouri Disabled Water Ski Association. They teach paraplegics and amputees how to water ski and take them out on the areas lakes and rivers. They are some kind of good people. I shoot this event almost every year and I never cease to be amazed that people do this voluntarily and claim it's fun.

The participant below may have been immune to the extreme environment. Who knew that Darth Vader likes frozen water sports?

Wipe Out

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Okay, who's old enough to remember The Ventures playing Wipe Out? Yeah, there we were, me and my friends hanging out under the el on Queens Boulevard in the 60s, wearing slicked back hair, black pointy-toed, two eyelet lace-up shoes (sometimes known as PFCs, or Puerto Rican fence climbers), black pants and white shirts, listening to California surf music. We didn't know surf from the wake of the Staten Island Ferry. But we were all so cool.

Now the wipe outs I see are those crazy water skiers on the Mississippi. I don't think the guy out on the river in a polar bear suit we saw yesterday is enough back-up. They need an on-site chiropractor.

Today on Downtown St. Louis 365 we talk to the homeless about what's going down.

I Wouldn't Do This For Love Or Money

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Okay, so the water temperature was about 34 F / 1 C. The skiers were, for the most part, wearing wet suits (although often with bare feet and hands). But good grief, they're out in the Mississippi River. It's not as filthy as it once was but still it's full of icky creepy disgusting organisms of every sort, not to mention untold tons of pesticides and fertilizers from agricultural runoff. Forget the wet suit. If I knew how to water ski (which I do not), I'd insist on a hazmat suit.

This character in a polar bear outfit with red scarf and cap, below, is apparently the safety patrol. If I were thrashing around in a nearly-frozen river trying desperately to cling to life and and this appeared looming over me, I'd begin wondering what circle of hell I'd been consigned to.

Today's post on Downtown St. Louis 365 is all about macho cops.

Cold, Wet And Possibly Crazy

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A St. Louis New Year's Day tradition: a large group of people gather at the edge of the Mississippi and go water skiing. On the most recent January 1, both the air and water temperatures were just above freezing. These people are wearing wet suits covering most (but not all) of themselves. and they are doing it for a wonderful cause. The event raises funds for the Missouri Disabled Water Ski Association. They teach handicapped people, even paraplegics, how to do it and get them out on the water. That's a bunch of good people.

It all started with Santa. Sure hope he had a protective layer under his red suit. But what's with that duffel bag? It was full of cans of Monster energy drink, which he gave to spectators on the levee after his ride. Umm, corporate sponsorship. I declined it. My hands were full of photo equipment and there are enough monsters around, anyway.

Today on Downtown St. Louis 365: mo cheddah.

What Is This Thing?

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I've never seen anything like it in my life. While I was shooting the New Year's Day water skiing in the Mississippi, a man walked onto the little floating dock with what looked like a hovercraft weed whacker. It had a seat, a single ski and a shaft that ran down from it to an airfoil cum scythe. What?

The rider or skiier or whatever you call him dropped into shallow water, grabbed the tow rope from a speedboat and rose up into the air, as below. The structure you see at the upper left, above, was clearly acting like an airplane wing but in the water, elevating the rider. How could it be stable? Then the rider sent it soaring and flipping, like an aerobatics plane.

The gizmo is a Sky Ski. Being someone without a drop of athletic talent, I was dumbstruck (although my right index finger stayed loose). Anybody ever ridden one? If the rider sees this post, please send me an email. I'd like to give you credit.

AFTERNOON UPDATE: I was glad to receive an email from our aqua-aerobat here. Jim Woodson writes that he and his wife "ski on the Mississippi and Illinois rivers pretty much every weekend (unless we are out of town skiing). Once you learn how to ride one of these toys...e skis, wakeboards, kneeboards, etc. get pushed to the back of the garage never to be ridden again. It's a whole lot of fun and VERY addicting." He suggests that anyone in this part of the country interested in giving it a try contact these people. Jim is going to get in touch this summer and we'll do a Sky Ski shoot out on the river. Sounds like fun.

Crazy, For A Cause

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We interrupt our coverage of First Night in St. Louis for the following news bulletin:

New Year's Day was cold but not bitterly so. Somebody told me the water temperature in the Mississippi was about 35 F. or 2 C. As they do on this day every year, a group of hardy or foolhardy water skiiers plunge into the icy river, all for the benefit of the Missouri Disabled Water Ski Association. It looked like it could cause heart arrest, or at least be very, very uncomfortable. Yet there were a lot of participants, some wearing top to toe wet suits and others with bare arms, legs and feet. The announcer asked if any of the spectators would like a lesson. Pas moi. If you're interested, there's a really good explanation of the purpose of the event here.

TOMORROW: a skier and ski - uh - device not to be believed.